I’ve recently moved from Switzerland to Spain. This rather controversial choice as seen by many, has been my attempt to listen to my inner voice and follow my joy rather than success, money or expectations of others. Being here now with more free time on my hands due to the choice of reducing my working hours as well, I found myself coming back to the eternal question of how to find happiness.
Imagine that you are walking with your eyes down on the ground, focusing intently on where you currently are, studying the path you are on. If you never look up to establish the direction where you should be heading or decide on a destination, where do you think you will arrive?
We live in a world in which people define each other and themselves based on accomplishments, titles, things we have heard about others or their circumstances. Even in therapy, the emphasis is put on talking about our childhoods or past experiences. We are made to believe that the events that happened in our past define us and forever shape our lives. But is it really true? Does the past have to be this chain dragging us down our whole lives? Is there a way to free ourselves from it?
Continue readingWe live in the age of information. Nowadays, more than ever we have access to thousands of sources of information. Even when we’re not looking for it, it creeps up on us on our Facebook or Instagram feeds, it sneaks into YouTube videos that we watch. Even our smartphones can surprise us with notifications of random articles we “might be interested in”. In this vast sea of information, it is hard not to come across sources that are completely contradictory, despite each being backed by “trustworthy” individuals or even science. Perhaps we are conditioned to seek for something that is the ultimate, undeniable truth but what if such truth does not actually exist?
I used to be scared. I used to think most people are mean, want to scam me or hurt me. And thus, I isolated myself. I avoided too much human contact. I was afraid to meet new people because I expected them to judge my behaviour, my looks, my personality.
Sometimes when we think about the future, we can find ourselves lost in pessimistic visions that create nothing but unnecessary fear and worry in us. Since no one can really predict what is going to happen, I believe such thoughts are better to be avoided. They will not prevent anything and just worrying about something that may never even occur seems pointless if you look at it from a rational point of view. Continue reading
Today it stroke me that in any given area in life we are bound to receive more rejections than “yes’es”. Whether you’re applying for an admission to a school, for a job, to a literary agent to consider your manuscript or even trying to get a date, an average person will get dozens or even hundreds of “no’s” before that one human on the other end comes along and accepts their offer. Continue reading
Does this phrase sound familiar? I surely have heard it in many contexts throughout my life. It is often used by people who, quite unfortunately, view change as a sort of attack on their identity. Any suggestion of improvement or an idea of reading a self help book sounds to their ears like they are not being accepted just the way they are. Because, in the end, others should accept us just the way we are, isn’t that so? But is there, in the end, a person in this world who never changes through their entire life? Continue reading
With the end of Christmas time and the beginning of the new year, there inevitably comes the day of the return to offices and schools. As this day approaches, the social media as well as our own conversations become flooded with sorrowful complaints that the free time is over. And it is in the middle of all this that I find myself wondering why. Continue reading
Browsing virtually any remotely social website or blog, I can’t help but notice the never-ending boasting fest. The photos of envy-inspiring travels, perfect bodies, dreamy partners doing all the right things, a splendour of expensive jewellery, cosmetics, clothes and apartments. A competition of whose life is more perfect, more carefree, more dreamlike is never-ending. Just looking at all those smiling faces on beautiful tropical beaches can inspire an uncomfortable, jealousy-stricken train of thoughts: why is my life not like this? Why is everyone better off than me? Am I doing something wrong?