From early on we are judged by preconceived standards and pushed into predefined labels. Things happen, we behave in a certain way and suddenly, before we realize it, it becomes who we are. By subconscious interpretation of events and other people’s reactions, we find ourselves defining who we are. It becomes our comfort zone – the comfort of knowing one’s identity. It starts with ‘I am a funny guy’, ‘I am a smart girl’, ‘I am pretty but I lack brains’, ‘I am good at sports’, ‘I am a rebel’, ‘I am an outcast’, ‘I am shy’, ‘I am unattractive’. As we grow up, it becomes ‘I am a banker’, ‘I am an average worker’, ‘I am a yoga teacher’, ‘I am a Christian’, ‘I am a mother’, ‘I am single’, ‘I am fat’, ‘I am a smoker’…
Continue readingHow to overcome obstacles and frustrations and make the best out of them
Sometimes in life we find ourselves faced with obstacles or situations that we don’t agree with but cannot necessarily do much about. It can be a decision someone else has made that affects you in some way or an unfavorable circumstance. If you’re feeling stuck or frustrated in a situation like this and it seems like your world is falling apart, be aware that regardless of what’s happening, you have control over how you choose to react and therefore, how quickly you pull yourself out of the negative feelings. Below are the steps I use to pull myself up and stay calm and happy whatever obstacle comes my way. Continue reading
High-vibe inspiration – my top 20+1 books, movies, series and songs
I believe that what we read, watch or listen to has a huge impact not only on our mood at the moment but also on beliefs we develop and ultimately who we become. Think of it like food for the mind. If you eat trashy food for a long period of time, you probably won’t look or feel great in your body. It’s the same with the content you allow to reach your mind. If you keep on watching romantic comedies where women’s only goal in life is to find a boyfriend or get married, you will very likely find yourself blindly chasing these things in your life too. Or if you listen to a lot of hip hop and R&B with lyrics that objectify women, you might find yourself subconsciously absorbing these beliefs and even if you’re female, you might find that you catch yourself behaving in ways that might make you feel unworthy or disrespected or judge other women through such lens. As many of us find themselves with extra time on our hands these days, I would like to share with you a list of my top high value content when it comes to things to read, watch and listen to in case you find yourself out of ideas or having re-watched all seasons of Jersey Shore find yourself craving for some more inspiring and empowering content 😉
Continue readingQuarantine survival guide – 10 tips to turn the curse into a blessing
The past weeks it seems that the topic of coronavirus has inserted itself into every single aspect of our lives. It appears to be the only thing everyone is talking about, it’s all over the news and what is more, it’s directly affecting our lives by governments recommending (or in some cases – forcing) their citizens to stay in their homes in order to cap the rapid spread of the disease. While many people are complaining how this is destroying their social lives or stressing themselves out about contracting the disease or worrying about where this is all leading, I would like to present maybe a somewhat controversial view on the whole situation. What if this could actually be a blessing for many of us? Continue reading
On chasing happiness
The 4th season of one of my favorite series (“The Good Place”) has just ended and I found that it touches on something that was on my mind for quite a while now. What if we were able to get everything we wanted in exactly the way and time we wanted? Isn’t it actually the things that we don’t expect and don’t even imagine they could happen that bring us the most joy and wonder in life?
Continue readingUs against the world
I used to be scared. I used to think most people are mean, want to scam me or hurt me. And thus, I isolated myself. I avoided too much human contact. I was afraid to meet new people because I expected them to judge my behaviour, my looks, my personality.
Continue readingCan you be an optimist without expectations?
Sometimes when we think about the future, we can find ourselves lost in pessimistic visions that create nothing but unnecessary fear and worry in us. Since no one can really predict what is going to happen, I believe such thoughts are better to be avoided. They will not prevent anything and just worrying about something that may never even occur seems pointless if you look at it from a rational point of view. Continue reading
Life as a chain of rejections
Today it stroke me that in any given area in life we are bound to receive more rejections than “yes’es”. Whether you’re applying for an admission to a school, for a job, to a literary agent to consider your manuscript or even trying to get a date, an average person will get dozens or even hundreds of “no’s” before that one human on the other end comes along and accepts their offer. Continue reading
How to keep our cool and optimism in emotionally charged situations
It is easy to be happy and content with our lives when there’s nothing bad happening. When everything is calm or when we’re away on holidays having the time of our life, it’s not difficult to be positive and look at things optimistically. But then something happens, something that we cannot control, something that makes us feel frustrated, upset or even angry. How can we keep that positivity in us when fighting the inner war of overwhelming emotions?
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“Don’t try to change me”
Does this phrase sound familiar? I surely have heard it in many contexts throughout my life. It is often used by people who, quite unfortunately, view change as a sort of attack on their identity. Any suggestion of improvement or an idea of reading a self help book sounds to their ears like they are not being accepted just the way they are. Because, in the end, others should accept us just the way we are, isn’t that so? But is there, in the end, a person in this world who never changes through their entire life? Continue reading